Hypochondriac attack

The instant I clicked the button to pay for my scarily soon impending trip to Australia.. I was taken over by irrational trepidation. My entire body trembles every night and my heart races so fast and furiously, I wouldn't be surprised if it burst out of my chest cavity.

Why this is happening on a nightly occurrence I don't really know. Abject terror of the terrors of the land down under, play a starring role in my nightmares. Yes there is a possibility (albeit a teeny tiny one) that a funnel web spider or Eastern brown snake potentially could fatally thrust their fangs into my flesh but... what are the odds that will happen to me? I can hear the Bloggersphere laughing in my face :D

Shouldn't I be giddy with excitement for my upcoming Rianneymoon adventuring? The smaller part of me IS. I've had the desire to visit these shores for the best part of ten years. I know I'm lucky that this is finally a dream that will be realised. And I truly hope I can snap out of this silliness before boarding the first plane.

WHY EXACTLY AM I FRIGHTENING MYSELF FOOLISH? 

*Flying. That in itself is a cause of crushing anxiety to me at this time. Purely due to the incidents in recent times. Though I will wish someone would knock me unconscious for the duration because the journey is loathfully long.. the duration is not one of the several factors contributing to my fears. I'm trying not to watch the news to avoid any catastrophic crashes which will prevent me stepping foot out of the airport.

*Loneliness. I'm Oz-trotting all by myself and as I'm getting on a bit, maybe everyone at the hostels will be young and beautiful and won't want to know me. It's not that I expect people I meet to be fussing around me but if I'm completely palmed off on account of being the granny of the group it will make me feel cruddy. Part of what makes visiting a new country so appealing to me is meeting new friends from all walks of life. If no one has a bar of me and I'm an isolated outcast, that will make this whole journey rather wretched. 

*Natural disasters. Let's not even think about those.... But I do, have and am. I stupidly search google (or your search engine of preference) to find out what is looming closer. Brisbane is currently bracing itself for a super storm off the back of Cyclone Marcia is bearing down on the coast. Residents have been urged to start sandbagging!! 

*Deadly beasties - just clapping my eyes on any of the MANY dangerous, venomous breeds of monster and I will run crying for my mama. Crossing paths on my intended treks  with a critter through the outback/jungle this IS a likelihood if I'm not careful and cautious continually. Fortunately, lots of anti-venoms exist and I will survive if I get transporter to hospital within vital time. However, should I happen upon a drastically lethal creature - I can kiss goodbye to ever seeing my family again :'( 

*Accidents - me being me, I surely will have some unexpected mishap or disastrous setback at some point during my stay in the land down under. Dammit, I'm a walking hazard! Thusly, I plan to go prepared for all manner of calamity. 

With all this unease piling high, you may be wondering why I like to roam this planet at all... I've been a restless little spirit with itchy feet ever since I can remember. I WANT TO SEE THIS WORLD - more than life itself (almost). Despite everything that is screaming at me NOT to go; this weirdo is desperately attempting to cast all apprehension aside. 

So long as I pull myself together and acknowledge that all my worries have the probability of (not-an-accurate-estimation) approx 1 million to one; I shan't be reduced to a gibbering wreck prior to leaving. NOTE TO SELF: Stop jinxing my once in a lifetime trip before I am even flying through the clouds.

Operation GET EXCITED TO DO AUSSIE THINGS (vegemite eating, crocodile wrestling, boomerang throwing and wombat cuddling etc)  - beginneth now. 

9 MORE SLEEPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!