Munich.. It's ALL yours Germany!

Munich doesn't strike me as a realm for relaxation, for it is monumentally manic. Unsmiley urbanites weren't exactly holding hands and skipping gaily about their merry way. It might be unkind for me to say so but I consider there to be an ugliness about the grubby, litter-strewn streets. I don't know when I turned into such a city snob; I wasn't setting out to write a blog about how much Munchen sucks but I won't be sorry to never see it again. 

ICH HASSE DICH - Maybe we just had dismal luck as we didn't realise all the shops (other than cafes and restaurants) would be closed because it was a Holy day (The Assumption of Maria).. maybe it was because we couldn't blame it on the sunshine, but the drizzly showers!!! Or maybe I was simply not feeling the love because we had a lovely time in cheery Salzburg (with weather that was SO gorge!) only to be met with dreary grey skies and an air of gloom shrouding over the metropolis. 

Just because it doesn't *POP* with pretty that's not to say you can't have yourself a angenehm (= pleasant in German) time! The drunken stags on wild, beery weekenders that they'll NEVER remember, (away from their missus) are certainly living it up on beer bikes, in strip clubs and smoking shisha. As are those in the beergartens while tucking into their curry wurst and jackassing around :D It's unapologetic for the unbridled craziness and I'm too old and boring to be amidst all these shenanigans. 

NO ESCAPE FROM THE THIRDREICH TRACES OF EVIL - I found it quite sad and ominous to make my way round old Nazi Germany, knowing Hitler made his mark and exerted his power so cruelly in the region. So much goes unspoken about this part of Germany's history which is swept under the carpet, to an extent. The shame is tangible but residents cannot hold themselves accountable whatsoever for the nefarious rulings of a past, hateful dictator. 

OFFBEAT ODDITIES - The Marienplatz Rathaus-Glockenspiel - wasn't that much of a spectacle but still drew in the crowds under the clouds. The collective 'ooh' when the creepy figurines actually come to life after several minutes of tinkling is one of the most ridiculously amusing things I've ever seen and heard in my life :D  

Eccentrically, an unofficial jumbo Micheal Jackson shrine has overtaken the lower half of a statue of a Renaissance composer (Orlando di Lasso). The Munchners have not lost their last marbles - it's apparently because this is opposite a 5* hotel that MJ regularly stayed in during his visits to beer city. Fans gather from far and wide, to bestow mementos and love notes beneath the memorial. 

ENGLISCH GARTEN - This was the one part I saw of the city that I actually *did* quite like. Everything was green, bright and autumnal; the leaves crunched beneath our feet. Being bigger than Central and Hyde Park we barely scraped the surface of the grounds but the woodlands were so unexpectedly picturesque, in the most wonderful way. When the weather is fine in the SUMMER time, t'would be a lovely place to picnic. 

Following the Eisbach river we reached the river surfers which the park is famous for. The novelty attracted a small crowd - to watch these chappies ride the waves and do a trick or two, before falling in. It would have been freezing in the rapids as it was a cool day as it was; these blokes literally couldn't be ANY crazier! 

In short, my 24 hours in Toytown were only enough to get the lay of the land. If I'd had longer than a single day in 'its' company .. would I have left kinda liking it? Now, I'll never know.. As the Germans would say, das ist NICHT wunderbar and I highly doubt my love for the village of a million people could have been bought even with schnitzel. Nah, Munich is not for me, mon petit pois xxx